Asking for Help…and Knowing It’s There

A friend and I were chatting the other day about our books. She’s published hers, and is busy doing interviews and special appearances talking about it.

I admit to being a bit envious. I’ve been thinking and talking about putting my dissertation into book form for years now, and have been actively trying to get it started since the begin20160923_121623ning of 2015, with no luck so far. I get completely overwhelmed every time I attempt to reorganize the material. So I decided to ask my friend what her secret is.

The answer I got was enlightening and extremely helpful, though it took me a while to hear it. She gave me lots of really great suggestions, but as it turns out, the HUGE INSIGHT wasn’t what either one of us thought it was at the time.

Let me explain.

The other part of our conversation was that my friend wanted some ideas on how to be less nervous when giving talks, which she finds difficult but I do not. My secret, I told her, is that I never feel like I’m giving the talk, or teaching the class, all by myself. I count on the presence of my Guides and whichever of the imaginal beings are most interested in sharing the information. I get nervous, sometimes, at the very beginning, until I remember that the Others are there, too, and will help out. It’s never just me.

Now, here’s the funny part: My friend is like that about her writing. “I never have trouble with my writing,” she says. Her Guides point her to exactly the right reference or reading material, and give her ideas and suggestions about what to write and how to do it. She’s never alone; it’s never just her doing the writing.

Light bulb!

This morning I sat down to see what I could do with my book. There is a HUGE amount of material already written, but I’ve been stuck on the outline—it can’t just be the same as the dissertation, obviously, but I’ve never been able to figure out how it might actually work.

But hey! How about I use my friend’s method? If the Guides are there for me when I’m talking, why on earth would I not just assume—KNOW—that they’re there for me when I’m writing? Duh….

So I sat down and wrote the outline. Literally. “Chapter One, …” and out it came. Chapter after chapter, in a lovely, sensible order. I didn’t even look at what I was typing—just listened and typed, without fuss and without overthinking anything. NO problem.

Oh my goodness. And of course, I can hear the laughter in the “background,” as they cheer me on. Very cool.

Isn’t it funny, how we all “get it” in some areas of our lives and absolutely do NOT get it in others? And yet we all have the answers. Sometimes it takes a good friend to give us that last nudge past our blocks.

And so I’ve started, folks! I’ve got words for a good chunk of the introduction written, and the outline of where all the other big pieces fit. It’s nothing like the order of the dissertation material, but it makes perfect sense in terms of why I’m actually writing the book.

Woohoo!

Now that I’m actually putting things together, I can make use of my friend’s other really good suggestions. Onwards and upwards!

2 thoughts on “Asking for Help…and Knowing It’s There

  1. Mai van Run says:

    That’s wonderful Kay! And yes, that sounds familiar; some of our lives’ areas seem to be completely blind spots!
    Since I know nothing about your dissertation: what’s your book going to be about?

  2. Wendy Jamison says:

    The unconscious is omniscient.

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